Funerals – Valerie's Voice

Meet the Neighbors

When I learned about the death of a former neighbor, I knew I would go to the funeral even though I didn’t know her well. Gary had a commitment, so I went by myself.

The funeral was out of town, so I was driving through country roads that morning. This lone tree was stunning.

That morning, as I drove to the funeral, I thought of all the things I had to do since we were having company for dinner, but whenever I vacillate, I remember I never regret if I “just show up.’” And again, that was the case. I was glad I went. Not only did her husband remember me and ask about our family, but I felt peaceful sitting in the beautiful church, filled with bountiful and amazing sprays and bouquets of flowers, waiting to honor Margaret’s life and learn more about who she was.

Margaret (84) and her husband (in his 90’s) moved into our neighborhood over twenty years ago, and then moved out several years later to other places. We would stop and chat whenever we would see them out and about after they moved away. Margaret would always remind us of the time when Gary and I and our two teenage boys brought homemade, chocolate chip cookies to welcome them to their new home in the neighborhood. She would repeat that story each time we met. She enjoyed it so.

At the funeral, I learned that she, too, would give her specialty cookies, snickerdoodles, to many different folks over the years. Although I brought chocolate cookies that day, the cookies I enjoy most is my mother’s ginger cookies.

I use my mother’s recipe for these ginger cookies, sometimes called ginger snaps.

I wonder if people bring home made goodies to welcome newcomers? I admit I haven’t for a while now. Here are couple of new ideas I’ve heard of…

A couple moved into a neighborhood and made cookies to bring to their neighbors and introduce themselves, instead of waiting for the neighbors to come to them.

When our son and daughter-in-love moved into their new house, they hosted an open house and invited the neighbors over so they could meet them. It was a hit.

It’s a gift to be remembered, however it’s done.

Happy Mother’s Day

My favorite parenting verse is Isaiah 40:11:

He tends his flock like a shepherd:
He gathers the lambs in his arms
and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young.

This angel sits in the corner on a shelf in my walk-in closet, visible everyday. It is special to me because it was my mother’s…and it highlight’s my favorite parenting verse.

My mother had a collection of angel figurines. I kept one from her collection (pictured above) but I didn’t want the others. An idea came to me to give them away at her funeral luncheon, held in the church basement.

I had not seen that done before (12 years ago now) so I asked a few others if it was a good idea to give away the angels at her funeral, and I got a lot of encouragement to do so. Since that time, I have seen collections given away at funerals.

I displayed her angel collection on two tables and made a sign inviting guests to take an angel home with them in remembrance of my mom. All the angels were taken that day, and it was comforting.

Rosella

A dear friend of ours passed away a couple of weeks ago. Unfortunately, we were unable to attend her funeral.

In preparation for our grandchildren coming to stay with us for a few days we brought out toys and playthings, including a play tent.

The morning of our friend’s funeral our grandchildren asked to play with the tent, so we set it up for them and they were happily playing in it. And then our son asked, “Didn’t Rosella make that tent?”

Why, yes, she did!

I’m so glad he thought of that. How special that our grandkids were enjoying the same tent that dear Rosella gave to our own boys when they were young… and now happen to be playing in it the morning of her funeral. I think she was smiling from heaven.

Rest in Peace, Dear Rosella. You were very special to our family.

Melody Lucinda

Today we attended the funeral of Melody Lucinda… She was my nephew’s (my brother’s son) stillborn daughter…perfectly formed in the womb yet died at 39 weeks. We sang the hymn “In My Heart There Rings a Melody”. It was a sad but touching service.

My nephew penned these words on his Facebook page:

“Well… today, 7/20, at 39 weeks 2 days, our daughter Melody Lucinda arrived.

Unfortunately for us, she arrived at the gates of Heaven into the arms of Jesus instead of into the arms of her parents. She leaves behind a Melody sized hole in our hearts as we grieve and mourn her loss.”

He also included this Bible verse:

“the Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” -Job 1:21

Her obituary reads: “Melody Lucinda, infant daughter of Daniel and Stephanie was stillborn on Friday, July 21, 2017 at Woodwinds Health Campus, Woodbury, MN. Melody was able to be cradled in the loving arms of her parents and extended family. Her middle name is in honor of her mom’s special aunt Lucinda LaVoie, who preceded Melody in death in 2007.”

The organization calling themselves Halos of the St. Croix Valley ministered to Stephanie and Dan. Someone from the organization showed up in the middle of the night, right after Melody was birthed (the hospital called them). They came to take photos and hand and finger prints and did things grieving parents would not think to do but wish they had later. Melody Lucinda’s hand and foot prints were on display at the service today.